


This Problem's Gonna Last More Than a Weekend

by unholyminter (oneswhonever)



Category: The Ultimate Sidemen
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drunkenness, Hotel Sex, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Road Trips, Seasonal Affective Disorder, Sharing a Bed, Small Towns, Suicidal Thoughts, like actually it sucks, the explicit rating is probably too much ngl, there's only very little sexual content i swear, this sucks, trash ending too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-21 00:16:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11346075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneswhonever/pseuds/unholyminter
Summary: Eight friends are all in for an epic, end of summer road trip.





	This Problem's Gonna Last More Than a Weekend

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SidemenFanficLover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SidemenFanficLover/gifts).



> Set in America just because? There's no reason besides knowing the geography better to be honest. 
> 
> This is another work that serves little to no purpose, other than to be a gift for a fantastic friend and writer whose work you should DEFINITELY check out!

_"Who's going the right way down a wrong way street?_

_Who's making a mistake each time our mouths meet?_

_You're smart and kind and easy on my eyes,_

_I know it feels good, that's why we shouldn't tonight."_

 

***

 

Undoubtedly, the idea had been Lachlan's, originally.

He was always dragging the lads out for any obscene activities that he found necessary. Camping was a big one - and one that none of them seemed to enjoy that much. Simon always bit his tongue, but the lack of civilization and the mural of bug bites that would grace his skin the next morning weren't worth it. He always went along anyways. He almost always forgot just how strangely liberating it was to stay up until the darkest hours of the night shooting the shit over a burning campfire. In these times he felt like he connected most with his friends. At two in the morning, sharing time would begin as they passed a bottle of whiskey around the fire (Tobi and Ethan never drank, but they were missing out, Simon thought).

He found out a lot of new facts about his friends, surprisingly. The lot, sans Lachlan, had known each other for a quite significant amount of time. Harry had been the latest addition to their group, but even that anniversary was going on ten years. Lachlan had transferred to Minnesota from Australia in their junior year of high school, and had been brought into the clique almost instantaneously when he and Vik hit it off (over Minecraft, the bloody nerds). The two had been dating ever since, and in Simon's opinion, it was almost strange. 

Simon had absolutely nothing against gay people. It was hard to be homophobic when you yourself were a homosexual, after all. That wasn't why he found it weird. He didn't have a good reason for that one, actually. He chalked in up to how suddenly everything happened. In a way, he was almost jealous of how easily the two found love, and actually made it work. He was jealous that the two practically had the entirety of their lives plotted out. They had a plan, and absolutely intended on sticking with it, which was actually really unfair. 

It made it difficult to be happy for them, actually.

It also made it difficult to even consider the idea of a road trip. He remembers exactly what they were doing when the concept was first brought into question. They were sitting in Simon's fenced-in backyard, taking shots of Bacardi. Simon was emancipated, had been since they were sixteen when his parents decided they didn't want him around. It was nothing hateful, actually - quite  the opposite. They trusted their son to be responsible and make good decisions. He was on permanent probation until he turned eighteen, at which point he could pretty much do as he pleased, not that that was ever an issue to him. The house was just a haven for all of his friends, really.

"We should go on a road trip," suggested Lachlan, his cheeks already bright pink - he was a lightweight, and was already becoming inebriated. Simon frowned, and swatted at a mosquito that buzzed near the top of his ear. It was late, and he could hear the whine of the cicadas, a tell-tale sign of the impending heat wave they were doomed to face. It had been coming for some time. "I dunno where. Anywhere."

"You're talking mad shit," said Ethan, who was toying with a hangnail. He was uncomfortable being around drunk people, understandably so, but he never left. He and Tobi liked to be around; in the rare chance that anything bad happened, they would be the sober and responsible ones in the situation. Absolute nerds, Simon reckoned. "There ain't shit around here. You know that."

"Hence why we go on a bloody road trip!" Lachlan exclaimed, following a messy hiccup. He got louder than intended when he was intoxicated, and he also nearly smacked Vik in the face in an attempt to put an arm around his boyfriend. "We don't stay in Minnesota - we go out and we explore!"

"Sounds boring as all hell," murmured Harry, speaking up for the first time that night - as far as Simon had noticed, anyhow. He also couldn't help but to notice that he and Ethan were pressed in quite close to one another, which was odd. "I don't know what you find appealing about being smashed in a car together. I need my beauty sleep, man."

JJ joked, "Harry, you're beautiful as can be."

"It wouldn't be boring!" Lachlan protested, seeming adamant on his idea. Simon wasn't swayed one way or the other at this point, honestly. "We could take two cars, four in each, ya know? And motels exist for a reason. No one has to sacrifice any sleep."

"Okay man," said Josh, and a fire was lit ablaze in the very pit of Simon's belly. In his drunken stupor, he couldn't decipher why this might be. Sober Simon knew that he was in love, but drunk Simon thought that concept was just ridiculous. He didn't know which mindset was correct, honestly. "You iron out this plan and we'll talk about it. Sound good?"

Sober Lachlan wanted a road trip just as much as drunk Lachlan had. Sober Simon was also beginning to think that it might not be so bad of any idea, so when they voted all in favor of this concept, he was the first to vote _yes_. 

Unsurprisingly, the lads followed suit. 

 

***

 

_"Who's waiting for answers from a boy who can't speak?_

_Will be holding their breath until their blue in the cheeks,_

_You're smart and you're kind and you're too easy on my eyes."_

 

_***_

 

Simon didn't know why he thought a road trip was going to be a good idea. It was a bad idea - a terrible one, even. 

He should have known that he would get stuck driving. There would be stops along the way, but they would all be in shitty motel rooms - undoubtedly infested with bugs and germs, which made Simon shiver to even think about. In his car, he was doomed to spend roughly eight hours a day cramped up with Josh, Harry, and Ethan. Lachlan had  _volunteered_ to drive the others, and Simon had little faith that they would even make it out of Minnesota without a collision. He loved Lachlan (hell, _everyone_ loved Lachlan), but the Aussie was easily the worst driver Simon knew, which said a lot considering Ethan Payne's signature road rage. 

He was okay for the first hour or so of the drive, trailing slowly behind Lachlan's car - if anything, he was unnerved. They had music playing lowly, with Josh currently in control, tapping away at his phone from the passenger seat. In the back, Ethan was curled up with a bag of chips, while Harry slept with his head on Ethan's shoulder. It was a bad idea, Simon realized in retrospect, to have left so early in the morning. No one was in much of a talkative mood, beyond the murmuring of greetings that occurred when they all met up. Out of the lot of them, Lachlan was the only one of them who was truly an early riser. Simon didn't doubt that the conversation was alive and well in the other car.

The ultimate destination in this impromptu road trip was Daytona Beach, Florida. Simon didn't ask why, but the destination had been Lachlan and Vik's decision. He supposed they had their reasons; they wouldn't be driving twenty-seven hours for nothing, after all. 

If anything, the drive was going to be pure hell. Simon was excited to get to Florida, to be in the sunshine. He was also excited for all their little sights along the way. He had been excited listening to Lachlan and Vik go on about all the destinations they wanted to see on the way. Now that he was cramped up in the car, sitting behind the wheel whilst all his friends were silent, all he wanted to do was get out and  _breathe_.

Simon wasn't the type of person for wild adventures. Most of the time, he was okay to be lounging on the couch and eating pasta with reruns of shitty television. Sometimes, he liked to go outside and play sports with his friends - the lads, usually, when all of their schedules correlated (a rarity). Beyond that, he didn't need any sort of dramatics or action in his life. Being cramped behind the wheel of a car was not necessarily his ideal day. He tried to tell himself that the destination would be worth it, but he wasn't quite sure on that. He didn't even know why they were hauling ass to Florida, or why he thought it would be fun to tag along. 

Other than the fact that, in the days leading up to the trip, he had been miserable. Just because he occasionally liked to sulk and mope, didn't mean the weather had to reflect those feelings. It had been raining in Minnesota for a week straight, and Simon felt the need to hop on a _plane_  and fly right out of the damned state. If there was one thing that he could say for certain, it's that the Midwest did absolutely fuck-all for his mental health situation. He was glad that he was surrounded by old friends, and loads of new ones that he met during high school, but the fact of the matter was that the damn weather was just unbearable sometimes. The first time he was faced with a Minnesota winter, he thought it was glorious. He and the lads spent all day playing outside and throwing snowballs at one another. It hadn't been their first time in the snow, of course, but it was somehow different in the States. 

Then, it didn't _stop_  snowing, and what was already on the ground never melted. Simon also found that if he touched said snow with his bare skin, he blossomed into bright red hives that resembled mosquito bites. Needless to say, he wasn't such a fan anymore. In London, the weather had also been totally ballistic, but never quite on this level. Simon was beginning to think that he would  _never_ escape bad weather. 

And yet, his friends all thought it would be a fantastic idea to speed down to Florida in the middle of July. Who would ever?

So by the time they reached Iowa (which Simon didn't know was even a real state until they became citizens), he wasn't in a particularly good mood. Besides getting out to use the bathroom in a shitty gas station, he hadn't had the time to stretch his legs. Simon was tall, and to have them all cramped up behind the wheel was beginning to make them go stiff. He wondered if Lachlan had the same issue. 

"What's on your mind?" inquired Josh, who still sat in the passenger seat. Ethan had offered to switch, so that Josh could sit in the back for awhile, but the offer had been declined. Simon didn't know why, and he also wished that Ethan wanted to drive for awhile. Or any of them, for that matter. "You're not being very talkative."

Simon glanced in his rear view mirror, to assure that Ethan and Harry were both sound asleep (and on each other, no less, which was  _weird_ ). "I know. I just wanna get there already. It's gonna take days and I really don't want to drive."

Suddenly, he felt bad complaining, considering the fact that he was the first one to agree to the road trip in the first place. He felt guilty - as though he had pressured everyone else into agreeing. Surely the lot were too stubborn for that, but he couldn't help but wonder sometimes. 

"I can drive for awhile, if you want," Josh offered, and Simon sighed. "What? It's a legitimate offer."

"I know it is, but we're stopping for food soon, anyways," Simon reasoned, and then mentally gave himself a slap to the face. He complained about driving, and then rejected the one opportunity he had been given to be able to stop. "In any such case, it's getting dark, and I doubt Lachlan's going to want to drive much longer after getting dinner. Drive tomorrow?"

Josh smiled, and reached over to squeeze Simon's thigh. "Sure thing."

He didn't move his hand until they pulled into a parking lot.

 

***

 

_"I know it feels so good, so good, we should tonight,_

_'Cause maybe my mom's right,_

_Good deeds won't save us, just true faith in Jesus,_

_So in the name of her good lord, let's do what we shouldn't some more."_

 

***

 

"Got the room keys?"

Josh smiled, the most innocent smile Simon had ever seen, and flashed four different sets. He handed one to Lachlan, one to JJ, one to Harry, and kept the last one for himself. 

Harry gaped. "I thought we agreed four to a room? We don't need four doubles just for one night, Josh."

Simon opened his mouth to agree, but Josh quickly shut it down. "It was about the same price. Besides that, don't you think we could all use a break from one another." He looked at Ethan and Harry, and gave them a teasing wink. "Thank me later lovebirds."

As the group began to disperse, Ethan protested. "Oi, mate, shut your fucking mouth."

"He's right, you know," Simon said, hoisting his bag over his shoulder to begin following Josh down the hall. They had found a nice place, with only one letter burnt out in the sign, to rest for the night. Simon would  _never_ sleep in a car with four people in it, especially if it was avoidable. Plus he _really_ needed to crash; they had a really good meal at a homely restaurant, and it was sitting just right. "You lot were practically snuggling each other all day."

"Were not!"

Josh and Simon laughed, proceeding down the hallway. Their shared room was, strangely, a fair distance from where all the others were walking towards, but Simon didn't mind so much. He felt it was very nice to get out of the car and be able to stretch his legs, even if it was only a short distance. Since dinner, and since the conversation had livened up in the car, he was beginning to feel a little better about their trip. Especially seeing as he wouldn't have to drive the following day.

Josh was actually his lifesaver. 

They came up to a room at the very end of the hall that Josh swiftly unlocked the door to. It was nothing particularly fancy, just a little room with one single bed and a television perched in front of it, and a door leading to a bathroom. There wasn't much space, but they didn't need that much. 

Simon dropped his bag down onto the floor with a hard thud before turning to look at Josh, who had closed the door and was already beginning to shed his shirt. "You get the rest of the lads one bed?"

"Mhmmm," Josh mused, kneeling down to tend to his bag and pull out a set of pajamas. Simon kept his eyes transfixed on the older lad's chest as he took a seat on the bed, fingers playing with the hem of his own shirt. "Figured none of them would mind, and it would save a bit of money. Four rooms was the best idea I've ever had, I reckon. I couldn't spend a second longer watching Harry and Ethan melt over each other." He paused, clean clothes bunched up in his hand. "You gonna shower? You can go first, if you want."

"I'm good, actually," Simon replied, still looking at Josh with quite lidded eyes. "I'm probably gonna have one in the morning. It's too late for me to function."

Josh nodded, before disappearing into the bathroom - the shower coming to life within the same minute. Simon stared at the same spot for a solid thirty seconds before tearing his eyes away, and standing up. He glanced at his bag, but shook his head to himself. He removed his shirt and jeans, keeping only his socks and boxers, before crawling back into the bed, under the covers. He and Josh had shared beds before, loads of times. Sometimes even completely naked (but that was a night that Simon was  _really_ drunk and those memories were  _really_ embarrassing). It wasn't any different this time, so Simon wasn't going to treat it as though it were.

He laid there for several minutes, his hand resting between his face and the pillow. He laid on his side so that he would be facing away from Josh when he emerged from the bathroom. His eyes bored into the curtains covering up the less than spectacular view out the window. He began to count all the stripes of the hideous pattern, but lost count when the shower was abruptly turned off. He wished that Josh was like a  _normal_ person who spent ages in the shower.

He could hear the sound of the door creaking open, but he still didn't turn around. He knew he couldn't handle taking a peek - he had made that mistake before, and had to sleep off a really awkward boner. 

Simon didn't know what it was that attracted him to Josh. He had absolutely no idea, actually. When he first realized how in love he was, he reasoned that he was so attached because they had always been close. Josh was just a very comforting person who's presence Simon always looked forward to. Josh just had this uncanny way of making him feel so good, and even though they were thousands of miles from their home, being with him just made things feel right again. Josh was probably the closest thing to normality that Simon could ever even begin to feel. 

It was sad, actually, that he put so much of his faith into the one person that he could probably never have. He didn't have one doubt in his mind that he would be dead if he didn't have Josh. He had made attempts on his life (twice, at this point, with a new gun hidden in his sock drawer that he could turn to if he really wanted to drive the nail into his coffin). Both times, Josh was there for him. Whenever Simon felt like everyone in the world was sick of him, or was ready to turn on him, he could always count on Josh.

He would never, ever, wish himself onto anybody. It was a depressing reality, but reality all the same. Simon fully believed that he was the worst friend that someone could ever have. He was self-centered, but he could admit that much. He had a tendency to dwell on his problems, and found that talking about the issues in his life was one of the only ways he could cope. Overtime, he began to think that people probably didn't even  _care_ about those issues. However, he could always rely on Josh to be his shoulder to lean on.

That said, there was a _lot_  that Simon would never tell him. Josh had definitely seen him at his worst, but there were several things that Simon just preferred to keep to himself. He thought it was better that way. They had never really had secrets in their friendship, but there were some things better left unsaid. 

Especially his embarrassing crush. Josh would never want to associate with him ever again. 

The bed's weight shifted as Josh got in next to Simon, and the blonde could feel his heart pound particularly hard. He squeezed his eyes shut, involuntarily shifting.

"Simon?" Josh murmured lowly, his hand slipping under the covers and up Simon's bare back. Simon shivered in response, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck stick up upon contact. "You still awake?"

That was a dumb question, but it would be even dumber for Simon to act like he was sleeping. He was _very_ responsive. "Yeah."

He could feel Josh's arms wrap around his waist as the brunette pressed into his back, his dick conveniently pressed right against Simon's ass. Simon could feel that he also was only wearing his boxers. Simon shivered, especially when he could feel his body begin to betray him, and he stiffened.

"I'm so glad we finally get to lay down," Josh whispered, and for the first time Simon realized just how close they were. He could feel the brunette's hot breath on the very nape of his neck, and the sensation was enough for him to  _want_ to press back. He wasn't sure what was going on, or what Josh was doing, but so far he had zero complaints about it. What was so wrong about feeling good? "This is the only reason I wanted to be away from those lot, Si. I'm sure you don't mind."

Simon's breath hitched in his throat, as the pounding of his heart quickly morphed into a feeling of anxiety. "...What are you on about Josh?"

He hated how weak his voice came out, in comparison to Josh's. The older lad was so smooth, so confident, in a lot of the things he did in his life. Most of the time, Simon was able to put on this facade that made it seem as though nothing were amiss. Of course he couldn't in a situation such as this, when it was the most important. 

"Don't act like I don't know what's going on, Simon," Josh murmured, his voice sending vibrations shooting up Simon's spine and tickling his skull. He hated how easily he could be broken down. Not just by Josh, but by anyone who had ever touched him like this. It wasn't a new feeling, by any means, but it was always foreign. He never knew if a touch like this would be caring, lustful, or flat out threatening. He wanted to believe that Josh would never hurt him, so he could more easily relax into him. "You like me. You think I can't see it, but I do. Say the word, sugar."

Simon shook his head, but it definitely wasn't in protest. "I do. You can't do this to me, Josh."

He could feel movement, Josh's hips pressing further. He was hard, Simon could feel it through his boxers. "Do what? There's nothing wrong with this, Simon. I like you and you like me. We're both legal adults. I know you've had boners for me. Tell me what's wrong about this."

"Well..." Simon's teeth dug hard into his lower lip, tearing at the skin and causing it to bleed. He didn't have a reasonable explanation to give that wouldn't sound stupid. That, and he's actually wanted to have sex with Josh since the day he discovered his own sexuality. "Josh...I  _like_ you. And if this is gonna ruin our friendship, it's not worth it to me."

Josh's lips ghosted over Simon's shoulder before he began to press kisses there, trailing them down Simon's narrow shoulder blades and his upper back. He spoke in very hushed whispers in between kisses. "Nothing is going to ruin our friendship, Simon. Is there anything wrong with added perks?"

Nothing wrong other than Simon didn't  _want_ to be a perk. He had been nothing but a perk to two boys in his past, and while they still maintained healthy friendships, it always felt like a kick to the face seeing them with their current partners. To some degree, sex made him feel cared about. With that being said, however, he also wanted a relationship. He wanted something that would last longer than a few months of sex and heated kisses. He had had enough of that, and he certainly didn't want that to be his relationship with Josh - the one person he could ever see himself calling a boyfriend. 

On the other hand, however, he also wanted to have sex right that very second. 

"You don't understand, Josh," he whispered, feeling his eyes begin to burn. As if the situation couldn't be anymore humiliating. Josh seeing him cry was definitely nothing new, but in their current state, Simon felt too vulnerable and exposed. It felt like a big deal, even though it probably wasn't. "I'm in love with you. This is gonna ruin it."

Josh chuckled, as his hands played with the waistband on Simon's boxers - his hips disappearing in favor of being able to tug them down. "This isn't going to ruin anything Simon. I swear. Would I be doing this if I  _didn't_ love you?"

That felt like a long shot, but it also felt like Josh admitting his feelings. "I dunno. People have before."

"I'm not most people, Si," Josh murmured, and pushed himself up on his hands so that he could lean over Simon. He looked at him, his crystal eyes soft as ever, and his thumb brushed away a stray tear that Simon didn't even realize had fallen. Then, he leaned in close, their lips mere centimeters apart. "And I do love you. God, you're an idiot - I've loved you forever."

That was definitely enough for Simon to wrap a hand around the base of Josh's neck, and close the distance between their waiting lips.


End file.
